Dumb Quotes

Chuck Knox

Most of my cliches aren’t original.

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Ralph Kiner

All of the Mets’ road wins against Los Angeles this year have been at Dodger Stadium.

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Pedro Guerrero

Sometimes they write what I say and not what I mean.

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Doug Collins

Any time Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team below 100 points they almost always win.

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Dan Bonner

The Minnutemen are not tall in terms of height.
~~during a UMass basketball game.

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Yogi Berra

Well, I used to look like this when I was young and now I still do.

Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours.

The other teams could make trouble for us if they win.

It was pretty good. Even the music was nice
~~said after attending an opera.

Congratulations on breaking my record. I always thought the record would stand until it was broken.

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Dick Cavett

If your parents never had children, chances are you won’t either.

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Mark Fowler

If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed, and it will monitor their heart through the night, and the next morning, if they wake up dead, there’ll be a record.

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Colonel Gerald Wellman

We don’t necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people.

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David Acfield

Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer.

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